“Experience teaches only the teachable.”
~ Vernon Law
Becoming teachable has been a hard and excruciatingly painful journey for me personally. I don't know about you but I have spent the majority of my life from childhood to mid-life running on self will. So how did that work out for me? ...Not too good!
There came a point in my life where I was literally on the floor with my arms reached out and cried "UNCLE" loudly enough for the entire universe to hear! Today by the grace of a power greater than myself...I am for all intents and purposes - teachable.
I was reminded this week during my meditation of this tendency in myself. My understanding of the universe usually comes in visual form so that's the picture I will paint for you with ...words.
During my morning meditations this week I kept coming to a place in my minds eye that looked very much like a "sky kingdom". And yes, my first inclination was to just assume that I had reach heaven or the kingdom of God! The images vaguely reminded me of something I learned as a child about "heaven"...you know pearly gates and streets paved with gold...but there were no pearly gates or gold streets. Just a place in the sky with enormous doors. There were several sets of the doors, situated at different point around this presumed kingdom. It wasn't a bothersome image and I seemed to be relaxed so I just let the images flow.
The images flickered along and what I saw was myself standing outside looking up at the doors. I tried to climb them but they were too high. I tried to knock them down but they were too strong. I yelled for someone to let me in but no one answered. I clawed at them, I shook them, I beat on them, I even searched the sky around them for a key. Finally after 5 days of seeing this image in my meditation - five days of trying to force the doors open, I sat down and ask what is the lesson I am supposed to learn from this experience. I sat in front of those doors and I finally felt peaceful, calm and serene. As I pondered this meditative journey - I began to laugh out loud. This is so me...forcing my way...forgetting to just let life unfold. As I sat in front of those doors today I gave up...it was like when I cried "UNCLE" in the bathtub...I surrender and now I am teachable, now I can listen.
