"When you are a truly happy Christian, you are also a Buddhist. And vice versa."
---Thich Nhat Hanh
I am feeling a bit sentimental this evening! I don't remember anything in my meditation this morning being usual. Okay, being unusual for me would be " really weird" for another! haha... I carried out my usual morning routine of 1/2 cup of coffee, hot tub, prayer and meditation. I was grounded and centered while I sat still - listening for words of wisdom...from wherever!? I say wherever because I'm not sure if this wisdom comes from within me or from the universe. My instincts tell me that perhaps these are one in the same. --ok, mind warp!
But getting to feeling sentimental. I went on a spiritual journey (another one- I need all the help I can get!) today with a friend. A special spiritual friend - the kind of person who is special for many reasons but most of all because they do not realize their own spirituality! There have been many synchronistic moments with this person - the kind where my ESP is performing on an amazingly high plane. Today, I arrived at a small church in honor of this friend and as I turned into the church parking lot I heard a song - "Surely the presence of the Lord is in this place" - in my head! In the church they gave me a program and the first hymn listed was none other than this song. I know it's just synchronicity but it happens alot around this particular person. Throughout my life I have had these experiences - and they happen more often with some people than others...but that's not what made to feel sentimental either...ok, maybe partially but that's a story for another day.
The emotion came as I stood in a small church - a feeling from childhood flooded over me. It was a comforting feeling not negative in any way It was a moment of complete vulnerability. I'm not saying that I don't often feel that way - this was different...there were a lot of spiritual people there, which isn't new - I belong to a huge fellowship of spiritual people...and I belong to a huge religious institution. I read enormous amounts of literature, magazines,books and essays attributed to religon and spirituality but this was different. This feeling was one that when I was little those around me identified as the "holy spirit." This feeling does not ping my intellect - it pings in my soul and it has been many many years since I've experienced this feeling. To say I understand it, would be - um, a fallacy.
In the fall of 2004 I had decided to become a chaplain. I was accepted to graduate school and then a grave series of events swept me up and I was chewed up and spit out whole (much like Jonah!) almost four years to the day later! I have diligently practiced this new way of life- dying to my infantile nature - my ego! I have turned over every rock and every stone, looked under every tree and thoroughly examined every facet of my being to arrive back at a place similar to where I began 6 years ago now - with a few minor differences. hmmm Sound vague- you're right - I belong to an anonymous fellowship and take that very seriously. I would rather tell you that I'm a Baptist-Buddhist! There I said it...I am a rare breed - a Baptist Buddhist with ESP nonetheless! That's where the phrase comes in "as long as the ties that bind us together are stronger than those that will tear us apart, all will be well."
The ties that bind in this case are the fact that I believe many of the Christian tenants - the main one being that I was Baptized at the age of 8, I'm safe - I practice Buddhism to the best of my ability, I'm covered, I follow the tenants of a spiritual fellowship to the letter - I'm a miracle. They are the ties that bind my soul the Universal Spirit - is it just perhaps I felt that childhood feeling today because of the this Universal Spirit and not the "Holy Spirit"?
The ties that bind are strong today. I am bound to my new found gifts of virtue and bound to my discipline of meditation. I am grateful for journey.
Peace and grace.
So,
